Wednesday, January 5, 2011

growing up.

you know.
i could possibly be the most immature person you know.
i laugh at all the inappropriate times.
i giggle at the word "butt"
and forget it if someone farts.
and i STILL laugh at "that's what she said"
i'm a 12 year old boy.

so i was for sure i would never grow up.

but i did.
and don't worry grandma (who once told me 'if you ever grow up you'll break my heart')
i'm still your little immature baby.
i still like to tp houses.
i still like to start food fights.
i love to play flashlight tag.
but i had to grow up.

and no it wasn't the bills
and it wasn't work.
it was taking responsibility for life.
and others.

there comes a point...when you realize.
your life is not just for you.
where carrying burdens for others is part of life.
it's part of growing up.

helping a parent get through something that a child shouldn't have to.
seeing them age.
seeing them struggle with their parents getting older.
when you still want to be the kid.
but listening to them anyways.
because that's what they've always done for you.
that's growing up.

or constantly asking a friend how they are.
even if their pain and struggle with love and life
breaks your heart every time.
you do it because you know if you can take part of the hurt
just part of it for them
you've helped.
that's growing up.

it's looking forward to Christmas not for the gifts you get
but the pure joy of watching your niece and nephew open their presents.
even though the little goobers only like the boxes and paper.
that's what makes you most happy.
or the fact when they puke all over you
you don't care.
you're just happy they still let you hold them.
that's growing up.

it's being a friend for someone when you want to be more than friends.
it's knowing their heart needs time but needs your smile to get through it.
it's putting your feelings aside to be there for someone.
being anything more would only cause more confusion.
but not being there would make them have to do it alone.
because they need you.
that is growing up.

it's going to a funeral.
when you really feel uncomfortable and out of place.
but going because that person was a friend of your friends.
and even though you never knew them.
you go ahead and feel that pain too.
so when your friend sees your face there
they know you are there for them.
that's growing up.

don't get me wrong.
i'm far from perfect and i miss a lot of chances to grow up.
but i'm realizing that just making sure i feel ok
making sure i'm happy and my life is ok
is not what i was meant to do.
it's not who i was meant to be.

we're meant to get out of our comfort
and carry burdens that aren't ours.
make them ours too.
stress for someone else.
it adds hurt and more trouble on our hearts than we should have to deal with.
it's almost like going out of your way to add pain to your heart.
but if you can carry some.
just a little for someone else.
that. that is growing up.

ok on a happy note.
this is about the only picture i have of Christmas this year.
ha one for the books.
it's my brother and i playing wii tennis.
i threw out my shoulder swinging so hard.
this was right before i got really sick.
i actually think i quit this game to go lay down.
haha so this picture makes me laugh
because i look like im going to puke on him.
love my family.

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